I-84 & The Plastic Spoon Conspiracy, Part 3

Quest for Something Holy

Author’s Note

 

            So, those of you who are my die hard fans are probably sitting there going “Did I miss something?  What happened to I-84 & The Plastic Spoon Conspiracy, Part 2?”  Well, let me just say that it is currently sitting in one of my notebooks, with about two lines written down.  I started it with good intentions, but the story would just not progress, so I skipped to what would be the third part of this strange chronicle.  In no way whatsoever are any of these stories linked, except for the fact that they deal with strange, but not quite horror, scenarios and I tend you use people I know in them.  As a side not for people who don’t know about me or where I come from, the things mentioned in the first couple of paragraphs all exist, except for the characters.  So, without further delay, I bring to you Part 3 in what will probably be a series that has quite a few more parts…

 

Revision #1

Author’s Note

 

            There’s not too much to this revision besides a lot of editing.  You won’t find any content added, or much subtracted from the original, since I was pretty happy with what I first put on paper.  However, it’s just nice to have crisp, clear sentences conveying your ideas to the masses.  Also, I wrote the description of Holyland before going there in January 2001.  I found that the real Holyland was actually quite close to my description.  There is a huge archway at the beginning and it does split into paths later.  If you haven’t seen the pictures I took, just ask me and I’ll tell you where you can find them.  (Actually, if you just go to my homepage and click on the Holyland link, you’ll come across them.)  Finally, it seems that some people are working towards cleaning up Holyland after all these years.  We’ll see what comes of that.

 

I-84 & The Plastic Spoon Conspiracy, Part 3

Quest for Something Holy

 

“Or, as the good Reverend would say, ‘Why we on this particular mission, we’ll never know.  But I do know, here today, that the Black Nights will emerge victorious once again.”

                        Jimmy- “Independence Day”

 

            Holly and her friends, Jon, Emily and Dylan, grew up in the town of Naugatuck, CT.  Naugatuck was a town that wasn’t small enough to be a small New England town and wasn’t large enough to be a small city; so they called themselves a Borough.  This was just the beginning of list of strange things that existed or occurred in Naugatuck.  For instance, Naugatuck happily boasted a river that changed colors because of the chemicals dumped into it; an Environmental Protection Agency Superfund site; a quirky sub-section called Union City; and a factory that produces Almond Joy and Mounds candy bars.  Bordering this Twilight Zone town was the city of Waterbury, and it was painfully obvious that the weirdness flowed from Naugatuck into Waterbury.  The pinnacle of this weirdness was Holyland, U.S.A.

            Holyland, U.S.A. was located atop the most visible hill in Waterbury and was marked by huge illuminated cross and an illuminated red sign that read “Holyland U.S.A.”  It loomed over the city’s two major highways (I-84 & Route 8), over the Brass Mill Center mall, over several cemeteries and schools, and over all of downtown Waterbury.  At one point, Holyland even boasted a sign much like that of the Hollywood sign.  In general, Holyland was probably the best known landmark in the area. 

            The interesting thing about Holyland was that no one really knew what was there, especially people under thirty.  Holyland was supposedly “closed” now and there were very few people who could remember when it was open or at what point it became “closed.”  Because of this, very few people in Waterbury and the surrounding towns had ever been to Holyland.  To many, Holyland remained a mystery.  Most people never gave Holyland a second thought.  The giant cross had always been a part of their lives and they accepted it at face value.  However, for other people, the phenomenon of Holyland invoked a deep curiosity.  Holly and her friends were such people.  They knew it wasn’t normal to have a giant cross overlooking a city.  For twenty-plus years, they saw the cross at least once a week and always wanted to go there.  Other things always came up though, and they never found their way into Holyland.  The closest they ever got was driving by it on a backroad that connected Home Depot and the mall.

            That was about to change.  Instead of going to the movies, playing pool, or egging houses, Holly and her friends were going on a trek to Holyland, on the night before Halloween.  They were going to find out what was there and in the process either debunk or confirm the rumors.  On top of that, they were going to find something to take back as a souvenir, something to prove they were there.  They were going on a quest for something holy.

*   *   *   *   *   *   *   *   *   *   *   *   *   *   *   *   *   *   *   *   *

            Holly sat on the front stoop of her Middlebury home and enjoyed the late October day.  Middlebury bordered both Naugatuck and Waterbury, but was drastically different.  It was a town filled with churches, large houses and  woods.  The previous June, Holly graduated college, took a job with the Connecticut Archeological Society and bought a house in Middlebury.  This left her with a quiet place to live and only a half-hour drive to work.  She thought it was a good start to the rest of her life.

            After watching a gust of wind ruffle more leaves from the trees, Holly checked her watch.  It was 3:30 p.m. and her friends would arrive soon.  Holly was already prepared for their little trek so she just needed to wait for the others.  She wore a pair of heavy jeans, a sweatshirt, a fleece vest and a pair of rugged boots.  Although it wasn’t cold as she sat on the steps, Holly knew that once the sun went down so would the temperature.  Thus, she had another jacket in her backpack.  Along with the jacket, she had a two D-cell Maglite, a few rags to wrap their souvenirs in and a camera.  As she pondered whether she needed more supplies, a black Ford Crown Victoria pulled into her driveway and parked next to her Jeep.  She watched as out stepped Dylan, who obviously came straight from work.  He wore a dark suit with a black trench coat thrown over it.  He grabbed a gym bag from the car, closed the door and crossed the lawn towards Holly.

            “Afternoon, Special Agent Wright.  How goes the hunt for bad guys?”

            “It goes very well.  Although, I wish that I didn’t have to come in on Saturdays to bust these guys.”

            “Aw, poor baby.  You come straight from work?”

            “Yeah, I figured it would be easier than going all the way back home.  I’m assuming that you’ll let me use your fine living establishment to change my clothes.”

            “But of course.  Go right in, you know where everything is.”

            Dylan Wright, the F.B.I. Agent, went into the house and five minutes later a different person emerged.  He was now dressed almost identical to Holly and he portrayed the persona most people knew best.  He had on the boots, the jeans, the sweatshirt, the vest and his signature baseball cap.  Little did Holly know, Dylan still had his gun on under the vest.  Holyland was in one of the rougher sections of Waterbury and Dylan wanted to be prepared.  He looked out at the street, down to his watch, then to Holly. 

            “You think they’ll be here on time?” he asked as he sat next to her.

            “Those two?  Not a chance.  They’re never on time for anything.”

            Holly and Dylan sat on the steps and watched as occasionally a car would drive by and stir up the leaves on the road.  The sky was free of clouds and the sun was starting its trip below the horizon.  The atmosphere made them think of many days spent raking leaves into giant piles, then jumping in them.  At quarter to four, while Dylan and Holly dreamt about their childhood, a dark blue Dodge Ram pulled into Holly’s driveway and out stepped Jon and Emily.  Like Holly and Dylan, Jon and Emily were dressed in jeans and sweatshirts, but they opted for fleece pullovers instead of vests.  Together, the four of them looked as if they belonged in the woods on some adventure.

            “Okay.  You’re here now.  So let’s go,” Holly said as she stood up.

            “Sounds good to me,” Jon replied.  “My truck or your Jeep?”

            “My Jeep, naturally.”

            Holly went inside her house and came out with her backpack and Indiana Jones style hat.  If there ever was to be a female version of Indiana Jones, Dylan figured Holly would be it.  Her three friends watched as she locked her house and unlocked her Jeep.  They piled into the vehicle and their quest began.

            *   *   *   *   *   *   *   *   *   *   *   *   *   *   *   *   *   *   *   *   *

            The drive to Holyland from Holly’s house took fifteen minutes and by time it was over, twilight was upon them.  To get to the entrance of Holyland, Holly guided the Jeep past a series of weathered, beaten signs.  After navigating some sketchy neighborhoods, the group arrived at a small, rundown parking lot bordered by a rusty chain-link fence at the far end.  Holly parked the Jeep as close to the fence as she could get it, and everyone exited.  They grabbed their gear, closed and locked the Jeep’s doors, then looked over their surroundings.

            “No wonder no one comes up here anymore,” Emily remarked as she looked at the trash spread throughout the parking lot.

            “Yeah,” agreed Jon.  “But it must have been much nicer when people actually came here.”

            “One would only hope,” Dylan said from his place in the growing shadows.

            Holly was too busy staring at the entrance to Holyland to notice the filth behind her.  On the other side of the locked fence, there was a wide, cracked, asphalt path that lead through a stone archway, then split into five smaller, yet quite wide, paths a hundred yards further.  From the parking lot, they could see the five trails begin their journey up the hill, cutting through small buildings and trees.  In the background, looking bigger than they had ever seen it, was the ever present lighted cross.  Now that it was almost dark, the cross was lit and generated a disturbing yellow glow.

            Holly turned to the other three and asked, “Is this what you expected?”

            They shook their head in synchrony.

            “Same here,” she continued.  “I don’t really know what I expected.  Maybe more churches and stuff, but it definitely wasn’t this.”

            They slowly nodded their heads in agreement.  None of then knew exactly what they expected to find, but they all expected something more…holy- something like a large outdoor shrine.  Now that they saw the entrance, no one could guess what lay beyond the stone archway.

            “What are we waiting for?” asked Dylan, speaking to no one in particular.

            “Nothing,” Holly quickly replied.  “Let’s go for it.”

            The four friends walked together to the chain-link fence and scrambled over it.  It was an easy climb, although the fence kept swaying and creaking as if it were ready to fall.  Once on the other side, they dusted the rust off their hands and followed the wide asphalt path to the stone archway.  The archway was made of simple gray stone and over the years, several large vines had made their home wrapped around it.  Underneath the vines and barely readable in the waning light, was an inscription that spanned the archway.  It read, Beyond this point lays a land dedicated to God.  Bring in with you only your faith and take with you only a better understanding of His glory.

            “Wow, that sounds damn creepy to me,” Emily remarked.

            “Yeah, almost like a bad omen.  Trying to keep us out,” Jon continued on her thought.

            “Yeah, and maybe we’re exploring an ancient pyramid.  We’re talking about Holyland here.  I hardly think it’s cursed,” Dylan coolly rebutted.

            “He’s got a point,” Holly piped up.  “Now let’s get going.  I don’t want to spend my entire night here.”

            The four walked underneath the archway and as they did, they felt a chill run up their spines.  Maybe there is something more to Holyland after all, they all thought, but no one vocalized.  They continued walking in silence until they reached the point where the one path became five.  At this intersection, there were several signs along with a small building.  The signs were wooden and the paint was starting to flake, but they were all still legible.  The largest sign read, Faithful traveler, choose now the path to follow.  Under that, sat five signs, each pointing to a different path.  Working from the one furthest left to right, they were labeled: The Old Testament, Jesus the Carpenter, Apostles, His Ministry, and The Death of Christ.  The sign over the building read Articles of Faith.

            “Okay,” Emily spoke after reading the signs.  “These signs are creeping me out too.  Whoever built this place was really a religious nut.”

            “Yes he was,” Jon heartily agreed.  “Now which path should we take?”

            “That one,” Holly and Dylan responded in unison as they pointed to the sign marked The Death of Christ.

            Jon and Emily shrugged and followed Dylan and Holly as they walked towards the path.  As the four of them passed the gift shop, the hairs on the back of Dylan’s neck stood again.  He had the horrible feeling that there was something in there watching them.  His hand unconsciously patted the spot on his vest under which the gun sat, giving him a sense of reassurance.  His attention returned to the group as they walked further on the path, pulling them out of eyesight of the parking lot.  Although there were no working lights in Holyland and the only light came from the glow of Waterbury and the cross, the group walked without aid of a flashlight.  They all had decent night vision and the less attention they drew to themselves, the better. 

            After five minutes of walking through woods that seemed out of place in Waterbury, they happened upon what looked like an ancient Roman building.  Instantly, they all knew what it was before they even saw the two stone statues outside the building or read the sign a few yards up the road.  They walked to the sign and crowded around as Holly turned on her flashlight so they could read the small lettering.

            “Station One- Pontius Pilate condemns Jesus Christ to death,” Holly read aloud.  She turned the flashlight on the statues so the group could get a better look.  One statue was that of Christ and the other was of Pilate.  Jesus was on the left and he was kneeling in front of Pilate, receiving his fate.  Holly kept the flashlight on the statues long enough for everyone to get a good look, then turned it off, letting their eyes readjust to the night.

            They were about to continue, following what was surely the Stations of the Cross- the depiction of Christ’s journey to His crucifixion, when they heard a noise come from behind the building.  They all turned and Holly pulled out her flashlight again, pointing it back towards the statues and the building.  Dylan instinctively reached his for his gun, but decided against it while Jon and Emily were set to make a run for it.  For a moment, there was quiet.  Then the noise repeated.  It sounded like a large animal crashing through the underbrush by the building.  It rose in intensity, as the four travelers stood transfixed, not knowing if they should fight or flee.  Suddenly, a hooded figure stepped into the flashlight beam and looked at them.

            “Holy Shit!  It’s Jesus!” Dylan declared when he saw the man’s face.

            Indeed, the man bore very close resemblance to the statue he stood next to.  He had deep, sunken eyes, prominent cheekbones and a full beard.  From underneath the hood of his robe, poked tufts of his long brown hair.  His robe also looked as if it was two thousand years old.  The original color appeared to be brown, but it was hard to tell because of the layers of dirt on it.  The robe had several holes torn in it and the bottom was nothing but a shredded mess.  The man carried a large walking stick upon which he rested the weight of his slightly hunched body.  To everyone’s surprise, he responded to Dylan’s prophetic outburst.

            “No,” he practically whispered in an old, raspy voice, “I am not Jesus.  But they say he has visited this place in visions.  No, I am but a messenger.  I tell you now that many people have ventured these trails, but very few have dared to under the cover of darkness.  Many strange things go on here and I should know, because I live here.  If your intentions are not pure, this place will know.  Do not do anything foolish my young travelers.  You are dealing with things you can’t possibly understand.  If I were you, I would return to your Jeep and go home.  Let Holyland be.”

            With that, the old man turned to leave as mysteriously as he arrived, but Holly asked a question before he could leave the light.

            “What do you mean?  If this is a place of God, then why would we be in peril?  All we want to know is what is here.  We want to learn about Holyland.  Why is that bad?”

            “Dear girl,” the man replied, looking into Holly’s eyes.  “You are probably too young to know the full story of Holyland- the story no one talks about.  You see, God is good, but also vengeful when people don’t appreciate his greatness.  For a long time, people came to Holyland to pray and bask in the glory of God.  Then, things began to change.  People started to view Holyland as a haven on the hill for religious fanatics.  People looked down upon Holyland and its visitors with disgust.  Only a devout few continued to make the journey, but even they eventually stopped coming.  They were too afraid to travel through those sections of the city to visit a place condemned by society.  Then came the day when they closed Holyland to the public.  On that day, it is said that God came in a vision to all the priests, nuns and brothers in the area.  He told them two simple things.  The first was that they shall light every bulb in the cross every night, lest a great plague fall upon the city.  The second one was that anyone being caught buying Holyland, trying to build something on Holyland or visiting Holyland without the intentions of seeking the glory of God would face the wrath of God.  This is why I tell you to leave.  It is not wise to continue.”

            “But who are you to know all this?” asked Dylan, trying to make sense of the entire story.

            “I am the caretaker of Holyland.  I have been since the day it open and will be until the day I die.  I will say no more except for this: Heed my warning.  It is not wise to cross God.”

            The caretaker turned and quickly shuffled away, going back into the darkness from which he came.  This left the two guys and the two girls to look at each other in confusion.  If there was any truth to the strange man’s story, then they were in over their heads.  They weren’t exactly expecting the wrath of God to befall them by simply taking a look around and maybe bringing back a rock or two.

            “So, do we listen to him and go home, or continue?” questioned Jon, looking at Holly and Dylan as he did. 

            “We continue,” they said in unison.  Dylan gave Holly a quick smile, then let her continue.  “I don’t think we need to worry about incurring the wrath of God.  Sounds to me like he made up that story to scare kids who venture near on Halloween, or Mischief Night for that matter.”

            “Oh damn, I forgot it was Mischief Night,” Jon replied as he looked at his Indiglo lit watch.  “That makes perfect sense.  He doesn’t want people vandalizing the place any more than it is, so he comes up with that story.  Plus, it’s probably easier for him to scare off the kids himself than to call the cops because I’m sure they’ve all but given up on this place.  Wow, he had me suckered in, I’ll give him that.”

            “He had me too,” Emily said, “but things still don’t seem normal here.”

            “That’s psychology at work,” Dylan said in his normal practical voice.  “The combination of the mystery of Holyland, that man’s story and it being almost Halloween has your imagination working faster than your rational mind.  Now, what do you say we get moving?”

            “Right,” Holly concurred.

            Holly turned off the flashlight again, and they continued up the trail.  Miniature buildings and greenery now bordered both sides of the trail.  As they passed this scenery, they half-expected the caretaker to jump from behind a building and yell at them for still being there.  However, he never did and soon they reached the second station- Jesus bears His cross.  They looked at the scene and read the sign in silence as none of the group was terribly interested.  They continued onward past the third station (Jesus falls the first time) and the fourth station (Jesus meets His Holy Mother) in the same fashion.  After the initial excitement, Holyland was turning rather dull.  They hadn’t seen anything worth taking home as a souvenir and they still had a ways to go before reaching the cross.

            They arrived at the fifth station, walked over to the sign and quickly read it to themselves- Simon of Cyrene helps Jesus carry the cross.  The four of them were going to file it as another boring station until they heard a loud scraping sound, like two stones rubbing together.  Holly was quick with the flashlight and she immediately held it pointed at the two statues that formed the center of the scene.  They watched quietly and waited for the noise to come again.  After thirty seconds of nothing but car alarms in the distance, one of the statues turned its head and looked directly at them.  They almost shit in their pants as they watched the statue’s eyes light up and it’s mouth begin to move. 

            “I AM SIMON OF CYRENE,” its voice bellowed through the near-quiet air.  “I ONCE HELPED JESUS AND WILL NOW HELP YOU.  LEAVE THIS PLACE NOW.  GOING BEYOND THIS POINT WILL PUT YOU IN GRAVE DANGER.  YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED.”

            With that, the statue’s eyes went dark and its head returned to where it had been, leaving the four friends in stunned silence.

            “Guys,” Emily began once she found her voice, “that was severely fucked up.  Are we going to keep going?”

            “Of course,” replied Holly.  “I came here to investigate this place.  And Goddamn it if I come to Holyland and don’t walk all the way up to the cross.”

            “That’s the problem,” quipped Jon.  “God might just damn it.”

            “Regardless,” Holly said, with a wave of her hand, brushing off Jon’s comment.  “We are going to that cross.  I’m not going to be stopped.

            “Whatever,” Jon calmly replied.  “But if I get hurt up here I’m going to have some issues.”

            “Ah, quit being a punk and let’s get moving,” Dylan snapped back.

            Holly and Dylan led the way as the group continued up the path.  Their pace quickened and they seemingly flew by station six (Jesus and Veronica), station seven (Jesus falls a second time), station eight (Jesus comforts the women of Jerusalem) and station nine (Jesus falls a third time).  Although nothing strange happened at any of these stations, the group didn’t feel the need to stick around to see if anything would.  They slowed things down once they reached the tenth station (Jesus is stripped of his garments).  In front of the group was an unsettling set of statues depicting the Roman soldiers towering over Jesus and beating him while they tore his clothes off.  The statues looked much too violent to be in such a “holy” place and that disturbed them greatly.  Something didn’t seem right at all as they stood in silence, but they decided to press onward.  If the other strange things that night hadn’t scared them off, then they weren’t about to let the look of some creepy and inanimate statues drive them from their quest.

            They walked side-by-side up the path towards the eleventh station (Jesus is nailed to the cross).  Along the way, each of Holyland’s other paths merged with the one they were on, for everyone was forced to see the crucifixion of Christ.  With each passing convergence of paths, the air around the group felt a little colder and that feeling of being watched grew exponentially.  Finally, they reached station eleven and in the small clearing stood a large cross with the body of Christ draping from it.  The statue looked very eerie in the dark and Holly quickly put the flashlight on it so they could get a good look.

            “Hey Holly, what’s that?” asked Jon as he pointed to a dark spot on each of Jesus’ hands.

            Holly shined the light on Jesus left hand to reveal a patch of dark red surrounding the nail driven through it.

            “Looks to be red paint.  You know, trying to make it look like blood.”

            “Then why is it still wet?”

            “Huh?”  Holly looked closer at the hand and saw that Jon was right.  The red paint (or blood) shimmered in the light and ran down his hand, dripping off onto the ground.  Emily saw this as well and turned back towards the parking lot.

            “That’s it.  I’m out of here.  I’ve had enough of this.”

            “Ok, Em,” Dylan started as she took her first few steps away from the group.  “But if you do that, you’re going alone.  The rest of us are going to the top.  We didn’t come here to go halfway.”

            Emily turned and looked at Dylan.  She slowly realized that he was indeed right.  Even Jon, whom she could generally drag with her anywhere, was going to see it through.

            “Fine, but let’s make it quick.  I wanna get out of here fast.”

            “Sure thing,” Holly agreed.

            The four travelers continued up the path, going by the last three stations (Jesus dies; Jesus is taken from the cross; and Jesus is laid into the tomb) without giving them more than a passing glance.  As they passed the last station, they noticed that they could see things around them much easier thanks to the stunning glow of the huge cross.  After the last station, they walked a few hundred yards through a section of woods, then came upon a large clearing.  In the center of the clearing, stood the huge cross, which practically blinded them with its light.  They all knew that the cross was very large, but they still had problems comprehending the size of it as they stood below it.

            “Well, we’ve finally arrived.  Everybody go find something to take home as a souvenir,” Dylan instructed the group.  Emily and Jon went off in one direction, while Holly and Dylan headed straight for the cross.  Dylan’s eyes were pinned to the ground, looking for anything interesting.  When they got within thirty feet of the glowing monolith, Dylan happened upon a battered “Danger” sign half-buried in the overgrown clearing.  He picked up the rusted, dented sign and smiled when he read the warning: “Danger!  High Voltage!  Do NOT touch the cross!”  He thought that he might just have to buy a cross for his place so he could hang the two side-by-side.

            “Hey Holly!  Look at what I found!”  Dylan shouted as he looked up from the sign.  “Holly?”

            Dylan had thought that Holly was still next to him, but now she was gone.  He looked back over his shoulder towards the tree line and saw nothing but Jon and Emily.  He turned towards the cross and found Holly standing right next to it.  He started to call her name again, but the shock of what she was doing hit him before the words could travel up his throat.  His heart and mind both skipped a beat before he managed to get her name out.

            “Holly!  No!  What are you going?!”

            She paid no attention to him; she simply continued to unscrew one of the bulbs from the cross.  Although Dylan didn’t believe the old caretaker’s story, he still didn’t think it was a good idea to be stealing lights from the cross.  Dylan thought about yelling again, but opted against it.  Instead, he took off running, trying to reach her before she got the bulb free.  Jon and Emily both saw Dylan running and then saw Holly.

            “Shit,” Emily said under her breath.

            Dylan managed to get within five feet of Holly before she pulled the bulb free and held it over her head.

            “Yes!” she told the world with a smile.  “Now this is the ultimate souvenir.”

            Emily, Jon and Dylan just stood transfixed.  The ground began to shake beneath them and a thundering voice came from the sky.

            “DON’T YOU HUMANS EVER LISTEN?  SHIT, YOU PEOPLE ARE DUMB!  I SHOULD HAVE LEFT THE DINOSAURS HERE.  AND I THOUGHT I MADE YOU IN MY IMAGE.  HMPH!  YOU’RE IN FOR IT NOW!

            The voice went silent and the world momentarily went still.  Then all the lights on the cross went dark, leaving everyone temporarily without their night vision and the ground continued its earthquake-like shaking.  Dylan noticed that the cross was slowly sinking into the ground and the ground around the base was caving in on itself.

            “Holly!  Get out of there!” he screamed at her.  “We’re leaving!”

            She deposited the bulb into her backpack and ran to Dylan.  He, in turn, grabbed her arm and pulled her along as he ran to where Jon and Emily stood at the head of the path to the parking lot.  Their eyes were adjusting to the lack of light and they could see a good way down the path.  Once the four of them were reunited, they took off down the path.  Dylan shot one look back over his shoulder to look at the sinking cross.  It was now one-third of the way down and the ground around it was forming a crater quickly.  Holyland was crumbling.

            Dylan turned his head around just as they cleared the woods and came back to the final Station of the Cross.  As soon as they entered the clearing, the four came to a complete stop as they saw the road in front of them was blocked by four Roman soldiers.  They weren’t exactly living soldiers, though.  Rather, they were skeletons donning the uniform, armor and weapons.  They had their shields held in front of them and their swords held high, a distinct attack position.  They took one step forward and Dylan immediately had his gun pulled.  He fired off an entire magazine, shattering legs, arms, ribs and skulls.  Within seconds, the roadblock was nothing more than a pile of shards on the ground.  He put his gun back as quickly as it came out and the four friends ran through the pile of bones, trying not to step on any of the leftovers.  From there, it was clear sailing to the stone archway.  There were no more undead soldiers, animated statues or other supernatural enemies to hinder their escape.  What there was, though, was the horrible ground shaking caused by the top of the hill caving in.  Dylan had only looked over his shoulder once and saw that the cross was more than halfway into the ground.

            As they reached the archway, they watched as a lone figure stepped from one of the bushes, directly into their path.  The didn’t need to look long to realize that it was the caretaker.

            “You have doomed us all!” he cried as they approached him.

            “Out of the way!” Emily screamed back as she pushed him to the side, allowing the rest of the group to pass under the archway.  Once they were through, an ear-piercing explosion filled the night air behind them.  They all turned to find the source of the sound and their mouths dropped open when they saw what had happened.  The top of the hill had exploded into the night, sending pieces of jagged rock and trees everywhere.  Dylan grabbed Holly and Jon grabbed Emily as they threw themselves to the ground.  Pieces of debris landed all around them and one exceptionally large rock came inches away from crushing Jon and Emily.  The first explosion was followed by another, this one sending what appeared to be lava, hundreds of feet into the air.

            “We’re all doomed!” the caretaker continued to yell as he scrambled away from the mountain.

            “Shit.  Let’s get the fuck out of here,” Dylan said as he helped Holly off the ground.  They raced to the fence, hurried over it, then threw themselves into Holly’s Jeep.  Without hesitation, she floored it and raced in the direction of her home.  Behind them, Holyland continued to spurt hot lava into the air, filling the sky with black smoke and illuminating the whole mountain.  The lava started to run quickly down the mountain, eating everything in its path.  All around them, they could hear people yelling and cars crashing as everyone tried to get away from the burning pit of hell.  Holly deftly dodged her way through the people and accidents until she was almost into Middlebury.   

            It took the group ten more minutes to get to Holly’s house and once they arrived, they immediately went inside and turned on the television.  Sure enough, the news channels were already covering the story.

            “I’m here in NewsChopper 8, reporting live from above Waterbury,” the chipper anchorman blabbered, “where we are witness to one of the most amazing natural disasters ever experienced in Connecticut.  Below me, on the site of what was once Holyland, U.S.A. now stands an active volcano.”

            The camera panned down to show the lava continuing to blast out of the volcano.  By now, it was covering a large section of Waterbury.  It had run down one side of the mountain, over the highway and was filling the land the Brass Mills Center mall stood on.  People were climbing over and beating each other as they scrambled away from the hot swell of destruction.  The camera continued to watch as the lava devoured more cars, some people, and the first few inches of sidewalk around the mall.

            “Residents of Waterbury are being told to evacuate immediately and to head to higher ground.  The destruction already is amazing and officials have no idea how it started or when it will stop…”

            The four friends watched and listened for the next four hours.  By that point, the lava was slowing to a stop, but only after it had devoured almost all of downtown Waterbury and some of the surrounding neighborhoods.  Holly shut off the television and reached into her backpack, pulling out the bulb.

            “Now, how’s that for an adventure?” she asked as she placed the bulb on her coffee table.  The other three gathered around the bulb and looked at it and Holly in disbelief.

            “It was wonderful,” Dylan replied.  “But next time, let’s not go on an adventure that tempts the wrath of God, ok?”

            “Agreed,” Holly said.  “So, Disneyworld next year?”

            “Yes!” Jon and Emily said in unison and the four friends erupted in laughter.

*   *   *   *   *   *   *   *   *   *   *   *   *   *   *   *   *   *   *   *   *

“A volcano, dad?” Jesus asked God as they looked down upon the mess God made.  “What happened to bolts of lightning?  Or plagues?”

“Ah, I just wanted to do something different,” God replied.  “You’ll learn that the best way to punish humans is to fuck with their heads.”

 

 

Pat Sheridan

November 1st, 1999- January 22nd, 2000

 

Revision #1

October 10th, 2001